Romantic love is probably one of the most depicted myths perpetuated in popular culture today. The idea that there is a specific mate for all of us, and the notion that we are looking for each other and when found that we will only be separated by things outside of our control is theme played out in numerous books, plays, songs, and other mediums across our culture. From a very young age we are exposed to these stories and society has taught us that finding love is an important step in becoming whole as a person. As small children girls often play dress up and dress as brides and in some cases children may even play a role in adults’ weddings where they are again exposed to this cultural celebration of romantic love. The promise of lifelong companionship, passion and support all contribute to this idea and we as a culture broadly subscribe to this idea and many spend their entire lives trying to achieve and obtain this. (Lausé, K.)
The biggest difference between the myth of romantic love and the other popular culture myths is that the myth of romantic love is that of emotion, and lacks rationale. One cannot choose to be in love, nor do you find love yourself, instead love chooses you, or you “fall” into it. It is this distinction that separates the myth of romantic love from others such as the monomyth or the myth of good and evil. The myth of romantic love is void of intellect and control.
Although not a new idea or myth the myth of romantic love is fairly recent in its acceptance in popular culture. In the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries the majority of marriages or unions were arranged and based upon the longevity of a family’s social status or for financial gain. It is widely speculated that Shakespeare himself often thought to be the epitome of a romantic in fact married for money.( Lausé, K.) The acceptance of romantic love by a culture can be traced back to the Romantic Movement in the late eighteenth century when the idea of falling in love was accepted by European culture. Although uncomfortable with ideas of eroticism of any sort early American Puritans culture was however centered around marriage and procreation.
The components of the romantic love myth are passion and intimacy. Passion is a powerful or compelling emotion or feeling, and in this myth that emotion is love. It can also be described as being compelled or driven towards something, and in the case of romantic love a person is driven or pulled toward s another. The second component of the romantic love myth is that of intimacy. The act of being close, trusting, open and caring towards another these components are generally reciprocated between two individuals in the romantic love myth.(Franzoi, S. L.)
The song “When a Man Loves a Woman” recoded by Percy Sledge is an example of the romantic love myth in pop culture. The song fulfills several of the components of the myth and is widely regarded as one of the greatest love songs. In the song the singer sings about being drawn to or compelled to be close to a woman, and acts selflessly to be by her side. He cannot keep his mind on anything else, and acts always with her in mind.
The movie with the same title “When a Man Loves a Women” is an example of a modern day love story. It is a story about a mans unconditional love for his wife. His love for her is plays a prominent part of his wife’s struggle to sobriety. Without his selflessness and understanding neither him, his wife or two daughters would be able to push though their hardships, for example, his determination to get his wife into rehab, while taking on the role of the mother and father to their daughters during her absence. Although he cannot completely understand his wife’s illness, he is never fails to be there for her.
The themes played out in these two examples re played out over and over again in pop culture. One of the reasons for this is artists can use this as a way to connect with their audience by portraying something that is widely thought to be a universal feeling. That is to say that we have all experienced this feeling of romantic love, or at least aware that it exists. I do not believe that my knowledge of the myth will affect how I view love movies or listen to love songs. I have always been aware of this theme, but not until this course was I aware of its placement in the category of popular culture myth.
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